When I read it again, I found too many flaws in this story with continuity, characters, and dialogues. I intend to edit it when I have some free time. Once I finish editing, I will post it again.

 

Captivating...

Well written sum_off!!!

Sum

Smart plot. Chaata sir was perfect character to explain that physical laws doesn't apply to feeling and satisfaction. Perfect selection of characters and event to show the importance of the Jacket. I have few possesions that speak my personality. Some are innate and inseparable ones that I can't show my generosity even if I wish.

I like your writings because of the brilliant pieces like this one.

"He walked away quickly as if he was trying to run away from logic. He did not want to deal with his temporary insanity, because he really felt great being insane."

Logic is business. I am not a businessman but I agree with the author. That was insanity.
Oh, wait, we can justify this if we could price-tag the satisfaction.

Great writing, great plot, wonderful selection of characters, bro.. you have the promise to be a great writer.

keep it up.

And I also think your story is worth being taught in english course in intermediate level.. i used to study "10 short stories" of foreign writers.. may be i think they should introduce your "Jacket" also.

Great Job.

Awesome.......

you are amazing writer ..i guess i don't have to repeat it.
first part really reminded me of the jacket my dad bought from his foreign trip.Only thing is i was youngest and did not fit me but i did wore later after my brother was done with it..hahaha..that jacket was nice.

Second part reminds me of a story i wrote long time ago..similar kind of sentiments..don't worry you didn't copy and pasted..hehehe..neither did i .
Excellent writing:)

First off, how can you come up with names like Bipin and Sanat? If I
ever try to write a story I can't go beyond Ram and Hari.

Thank you for writing about dear old Kathmandu. I wished more of your
stories were based there. I hope you continue to capture the spirit
of our hometown in more of your writings. Thank you for seeing
Bhatbhateni, Tangal Ganesh, Bhagwati Bahal and Maitidevi through our eyes.

is the land at kaalikasthan more expensive than at Baluwatar?

And dont each one of us have our equivalent of the leather jacket at home
in Nepal? Only that we didnt give it away to the beggar. But we all
have at some point in our lives been more generous than would
seem logical.

"“You told me Ashish dai took the motorbike with him. How do you plan
to come that early in the morning?” Bipin was concerned—after all they
were best of friends, and the winter that year had been quite unforgiving.""

On the contrary going by bike would have been impossible in the cold.
Anybody who has rode a bike in kathmandu's winter (morning) knows. But then
again this is Bipin's logic.

Lastly, Do you have to be this good? Please get lost from sajha and
find yourself an editor. Wouldnt some organization like Martin
Chautari sign you?

Sum_off,

Dissident again, accumulating the money you promised to transfer to my paypal account.

Liked the story very much. I know it is a fiction, but 'Monday, Wednesday and Friday for a private tuition in Physics at Lalit sir’s place', this sounds familiar to me. You did that in your I.Sc, didn't you? I did too.

Cheers.

great piece of art pearljam. we could get rid of cold jackets , how about getting away from cold feelings?

ooops sowie sum_off
on de verge of my breakdown i would say
great piece of art sum_off

Sum Off,
As usual, excellent job !!! Very inspiring too..
Reminded me of my ol' Kathmandu..and all the temples and cold cold foggy winters when we used to go tuition and college etc. Great work..
We are waiting for MORE !!

KEEP IT FLOWING MISTER...

A very beautiful story. Loved it immensely... not only did it remind me of all the places in nepal but also touched something in the heart!! hope to read more stories from you. All I can say is Bravo!

Rudra ji – Usually when someone writes a comment on my thread that I don’t necessarily agree with, I click on the user_id and check that individual’s other postings. The mere purpose of my prying is to establish who I am dealing with. Though I don’t agree with you on the ending of my story, I’m 100% with you on the topic regarding the movie that depicts the fictitious killing of George Bush. I am a staunch liberal and I fear this documentary/movie, whatever it is, like the one mis-directed by Michael Moore in 2004, may only rally Bush’s base of fanatics and bigots. I see no positive coming out of this to help liberals in the midterm election. That is the sole reason I never share my political essays here, this administration has made me a caustically bitter resident.

freak_alien/yacc/guchha/sndy/rythm – to have entertained you as you claim, pleasure is for me to owe. Remarks like yours make me feel like an escort after a generous tip. Hey I just sold me again.

Sunnydev – You always pick the best lines from my story. One of my awkwardly arrogant cousins, who is already 31, is still looking for the perfect man that ‘Saibaba’ is yet to award her. Please help her pick one, I like what you pick—you simply pick the best. Thank you for identifying the nuance behind ‘Chhataa professor’, it may look so for the quick readers, but he was not a casual import in the story.

Suraj2006 – Thank you, sir. As accented as I am, I’ll not be teaching this English course, however. In all seriousness… Most of the people we admire are only marginally better than us. It is marginally easier to admire them than trying to be as good as them. So we read them, instead of telling them our own stories. I, never for a second, have assumed that my thoughts are worth being printed permanently. That’s why I write in Sajha. But I thank you for believing in me.

imi – This is the first story that I ever wrote. That was back in December of 1996. I regret nothing more in life than not writing a word for the next eight years. A shorter version of this story was published in one of the Nepali magazines in 1997. So if there is a coincidence, you’re busted. I smell plagiarism. To quote you: “hehe.”

nepalonmymind – You are my most favorite person in Sajha, because you think in paragraphs. I always value your tips. Why would you need names like Ram and Hari? Use names like Sita and Laxmi. There are very few writers in Nepal who write about women. Samrat is a brilliant writer, but it seems he can only write about women after an overdose of Viagra. I have never read a writer from our neck of the woods, who is that sex-crazed. You need to start writing about women.

Dissident – We have not committed on the amount, have we?

Angeleyes – Thank you Dixie Chick. Sometimes I wonder names are so optional, my parents could have easily named me off_sum instead of sum_off.

Keho -- Got your email. The first part is true. The second part is not. He was a good teacher. Hope he is doing fine.

I am not a staunch liberal per se, but I vote democratic. Anyway, you are a very good writer. Keep em coming. Many of us only post once in a blue moon, but we sure as hell enjoy reading your stories. They are pretty engrossing.

SUM OFF,
We're waiting for more !!! Sajha is boring without your threads..

SUMOFF really sajha's kurakani is getting bored , ...need your story to spice it up .plezz.

Peeked into this particular thread by sheer boredom and the first few lines juss grabbed at me. Do please keep writing. And in pure Sitara fashion..stick your name to the thread..for the readers in us all. Some threads are better peeked into than others,methinks. Kudos to you.
PS* I cud feel the bone piercing cold of early morn Ktm in the dead of winter.

gone with the wind..

as someone else suggested i think its time u get an editor and start writing professionally. dude u are so good. i especially love your narrations and totally identifiable characters. u r are for prime time. good luck and plz keep posting more of your wonderful fictions. by the way i am great fan of your days in nepal too

Loved it. Sum off bro hows bhauju? Are you keeping her cosy in this winter? YOu may end up losing much more than your jacket you know.