The sweet smell of cinnamon drifted in the air as she walked across the mall. The smell that would haunt her forever. She tried to close her eyes in an effort to force away the thoughts that were haunting her. But instead of it all going away, she saw his face. It felt like she could reach out her hand and draw her fingers through the smooth line on his forehead and caress his cheek. She opened her eyes as soon as she could and felt small drops of perspiration on her forehead. Her brown almond shaped eyes had no emotions in them though.

"Are you alright honey? You seem to be perspiring!" Damn that freaking man. Why did he have to be so observant and notice every small detail?

She looked at him with a bright smile on her face and tried her best not to show her displeasure at the sight of him. "Oh nothing to worry about sweetie. These people turn on the heat too high, and you know how I can’t stand high temperatures."

Her husband seemed to be satisfied at her explanation. He smiled and brushed his knuckle on her cheek affectionately and then diverted his attention to the shops that were brightly decorated. Everyone was festive and cheery. People were greeting each other with warmth in their voice. She was disgusted at the glitter in their eyes at the thought of giving gifts to their dear ones. 'The Christmas spirit' they called it. The worst time of the year for her. The time that would remind her that again and again that dreams were only created to be shattered.

It was ten years ago that she had landed in the land of dreams. She had been away from him for two years and there had not been a day that she had not thought of him. She had wept herself to sleep for the first couple of weeks but the hope of meeting him again kept her going through the tiring days. She had come to the United States with a F-1 visa and a $10,000.00 scholarship at the Whitworth College. It was a private college in a small city that deprived her of any chances of working under the table. The only reason for her abruptly aroused interest in getting her higher education completed in the USA was the hope of seeing him again.

She had been 18 years old when his mesmerizing eyes and easy sense of humor had swept her off her feet. He was 23 at that time and she had understood that he was completely out of her league. The closest that she could ever get to him was in her thoughts where he was her savior who would take her away from the black and white world she lived in. When he showed interest in her, she had been pleasantly surprised and more than willing to give every bit of herself into the relationship. He had always told her how attracted he was to her simplicity and innocence. She was his "innocent baby" and he would do anything to maker her happy. Well that's what he had always claimed.

The first few months consisted of stolen kisses and shy, abrupt hugs. She would blush at the thoughts of what they had done together and think of him till the dark blanket of sleep would take her in its arms. When he had announced one day that he was leaving for the United States with no plans of returning to Nepal, she was shattered. He had won the DV lottery and his aunt had agreed to sponsor him. He had only two months left to stay in Nepal. She had wept herself to sleep that night feeling helpless and frail thinking about losing him. Her eyes were red the next day when they met. What he said next had changed her life...

Yes Gwayjo... your brilliance just outshines everyone! IT was very smart of her to get married to someone just few days before he left for U.S. Absolutely innocent of her not tell her friend's or family ofcourse. She is so innocent that she convinced her parents that U.S. is a good place for her to waste their hard earned money so that she could get the education she never completes. Her innocence that leads her to transfer to a whole new place just to "give him a surprise"...Very VERY innocent of her to marry someone and deceive him for more than seven years mind you... He dotes on her right? And she just innocently keeps loving the creep who duped her! Innocence ofcourse...

And yes did I mention how Smart I think you are? Oh WOW! Just astounding!

P.S. Never said shit does not happen in life... but just because you screw up your life, does not mean it was because of INNOCENCE... Well no offense to anyone else... Except Gwayjo ofcourse!

Rhythm..
u r too much! brought tears into my eyes. I am glad...my destiny took a better mode for me than her.

...and they lived happily ever afterwards. ;)

I am looking at the positive side of the coin-life. Please bear with me. :)

I won't come down at your level by offending just because I disagree. She was ofcourse innocent at the time she got married; the middle class mentality as elaborated in the lines:

"She had been shocked and frightened at his proposal. Her family was not very supportive or liberal. If they ever found out that she was dating someone, let alone about to marry someone secretly, they would disown her."

She was innocent at that time and she had sex with him because she is now her wife. This part of story also resembles the scenes of movie 'Parineeta'. She was innocent also in the sense that she trusted him. She couldn't tell because she knows the consequences of telling it; but she might have thought to tell her parents when they get married formally. Her main objective of coming to US was meeting with her husband. However, she did not intend to waste her parent's money as the story mentions her getting scholarship of $10,000. Love can let people to do anything. After being brave enough to come to US, going to new city becomes the tiny issue. I don't see any relation between giving surprise and innocence.

Some people never stop complaining. Regarding your "And she just innocently keeps loving the creep who duped her! Innocence ofcourse... ". I think that I already answered that with "she's already corrupted and had been deceived, and now more likely to act with pre-cautions". So her innocence has perhaps gone after being deceived. People like to call corrupted people like this smart and brilliant, and innocent as her earlier life as stupidity.

The story looks too dramatic.
Being not able to forget him (or forgive him) for more than 10 years...goosh...sounds rather grossly silly.....the worse part was that she had meet him in her late teens. How mnany of us really remember someone who stole your heart when you were 18 ?

Kasto manai chhune katha lekheko Rythm le.

Firstly I would like to thank everyone for reading the story. I was surprised to see so many replies.

And my special humble and heartfelt thanks to Indi and Nirman for understanding how "emotional and teary" I am (and also for telling the rest of the world about my oh-so-emotional nature)!! ;) And maybe I will finish the dewar bhauju story some other day... actually i got bored with it but lemme think of what happens next.

Whateva.. about the legal thing in marrying two people... well they had a court marriage and no one really knew.. plus someone has to file a case against him for some legal action to take place. And yes my character was a bit weak.. was trying to potray how naive people can be and how they can change after something drastic.

Of course gwajo really defended me on that ;).. nice explanations. Thanks .

Khaobadi, well it was ten years ago but something like marrying you and then going off with someone else cant really be forgotten. Especially when you risk it all to be with someone .. and also when you end up some place where you had never intended to be, illegal and working in a pub. But maybe it was a little dramatic.

The ending was cut a bit short.. I intended to make it a bit longer.. Anyway really appreciate your reading the story and commenting on it :)

mero sis and the tragedy stories she writes :o| ..oi malai peer paryo!:@ ;oP hehe...oh well she is she i guess...;oP hehe..

anyways nice to see u write again sis ;o)..carry on ;o)...

good day :oD
(oh i did enjoy it ..in case u thot i didnt ;oP hehe)

Rythm,

This was beautifully written. It was poignant but I liked the end partly becuase it allows the reader to put in their own perspectives and come up with an ending that they can live with (without having to soak up the box of kleenex) :-)

Anon,
Nice seeing you again..hopefully the kangaroos and the beauties down by Bondi beach are treating you well :-)

wah.. wahh.. wahhh..
this could be another award winning movie!!!
lets take it to the Hollywood!!!!
;) hehehehehe

PS: I would NOT want to be the producer of this movie..
.. it was very well written..

oho someone is here?hi fellow nepaali!!(if i say felli..u know i aint a felli so sounds weird :o| know wat i mean ;oP ..dun wanna sound girly now do i?and if anyone says i do!:@ errrr...salla gay!i know wat ur dreamin of ;oP hehe

dyam the things that can happen after just a few mins hehe..came back from downstairs(had to do smthing) and refreshed this..and wat do i see?:o| and even a hi to me too?abui!!now i feel so special!!(yeah right wahahaha ;oP hehe)...anyways glad to see u..was about to go to the hardy thready (if u do err..believe me hehe) thts why i came back upstairs duh!if not kinda busy downstairs :oS..(anyone gettn curious?i was tryn to make u feel that re kya..not that i wanna u to be killed..unless...unless...can i hear some nice meows ;oP hehe wat the hell am i sayn anyways?makes any sense?:o| if it does..explain to me too wahahaha ;oP)

ok...anyways..dyam there are beauties in bondi beach ho?:o| why didnt u tell me earlier!!!sheesh!jahiley kati dhilo suchana ho!:@ ;oP hehe...weather is cloudy today..forcast said it shud rain..and during weeknds too..hopefully it wont rain on sunday..kinda prayn for that(tho of cos when i say i pray..i dun mean kneel down etc ;oP hehe)..and kangaroos?urghh wish someone introduced one to me..so that i can say i know one :oS..and see how it treats me hehe...cant just assume and speculate when one hasnt got the experience hoina?;oP hehe...im sure kangaroos are nice creatures..(givin benefit of the doubt hehe)..but who knows?..and oh dun ask me about the beauties..not yet ;oP hehe..herum when will i go to bondi!the beach is nice!!:oD..weather pani ramro hunu paryo to go there..plus need to find some frens willin to tag along or willin to let me tag along ;oP hehe...so yap lets not even speculate anything ;oP..beach ni jannu chaina..beauties ta kohiley dhekney hola..(of i been told i seem to not even see when things are right infront of me re :o| hehe) and chinchey ta jhan ke bhannum..so how will i be treated?time will tell ;oP hehe

anyways better go to the other one..need to say hi to our dear MIA sandhurst bro..kinda cant stop thinkn he might have been busy with the vday preparation and all..so since that dreaded day is over..hopefully he be back ;o)..just a speculation that needs to be cleared by him ;oP hehe...and oh if u dun mind me..ma pani gettn curious..can i at least know wat continent a fellow nepaali is in ;o)..thot it might be around sandhurst bro(not just thot ..i wished re kya ;oP hehe) but then again..well who kows hoina?cos its kinda late there now..so now thinkin i most prob am wrong..its just for curiosity sake ;o)..and its our choice ;oP hehe..(pressure bhoyo to share??hope so re kya ;oP hehe)

-------
bond bro..producer hoina..hero huney bichar cha ho ki kaso?wahahahah ;oP..btw got 2 leadin male roles in that script..wat do u wanna be ;o)...the 1st or the 2nd hubby?i think 2nd hubby lai chai manchey ley kya feel garcha ;o)...but of cos..1st one pani kaha kaam(little) cha..;o)..seems like the u know..'wanted' type ;oP hehe...

so hehe make ur choice?oh dun want any role?...anyways who wanna be the heroine here?heroine or well..just another gal eh?bichari hoina?;oP hehe...laat dinchu if anyone tries to get me sympathy vote!:@ ;oP hehe..esto rmaro hubby pauda pani ke garney..grass always looks greener on the other side :oS..(oh yes i been labelled insensitive!do u wanna read the sign i have on me to prove it??;oP hehe)

la la enuf..

good day :oD

Rythm if i know you , then i believe that you are not as emotional person as you claim by someone or peraphs by yourself.But, as usaul i can be wrong, and there is all possibiliteies that i am alwauys wrong at the first time. futher there is no need to mention, but couldn't stop saying that your words are always to the heart and simply very very pleasent to ear.

rythm,
nice flow and it does bring back memories (O:

"first love" huh hard to forget .. is that what is inspiring all these stories (O:

happy valentine's day and njoy ...
try not to b too senti..

=====================================================
anywhoo.
what do i know (O:

Thanks again for the comments but the "teary and emotional" statement was supposed to be a sattire. Just a joke disco senti (whoever you are..{{aloneness II?}}. thapap... why would you think I would get senti.. did I give the wrong impression??^o)

nice reading Rythm. Kudos!

nice story

rythm!!!as i said before n this time- your words are always fascinating, very pleasant to ear. close to heart and always inspiring, but it is very clear now that u r a lady of words not action. all those beautiful words that u write are always missing in your behaviour. it is for sure u r a complex by nature, just remember these 2 line

1. ACTION SPEAKS LOUDER THAN SOUND
2. TRUTH COMES WITH ACTION NOT WORDS.

Ok! Where's the rest of the story... Its like having been hooked to a soap opera.... the boyfriend has been dead for several years, the girl marries and then they end the damn thing with the boyfriend's mysterious appearance.... to be continued... with the attrociously shocked face on the girlfriend's and the audience's.

Where's the rest of the story girl.... if you dont write it soon i'll do it my self and post it... might not be as good as yours though... so SAVE the plot.

~color of strife

Aloneness, you have to read the whole book to judge it rather than just looking at the cover! observing someone's behaviour for 10 minutes gives you no idea of how the person really is. About my words.. well I am atleast glad you had something good to say about them. Psychology is certainly not your department as you cannot even understand the real meaning behind a light hearted joke. Try to look into the jokes and see their real meaning. being too sensitive to small things deprive you from experiencing the real fun. Anyone could get tremendously hurt by being called names such as "stupid and ghamandi" or they can laugh it off as a joke... try to understand what the meaning behind those words really are.
"Its your perception of a person that really makes a judgement about them." Have you ever tried altering your perception of people around you rather than always getting offended by their light hearted jokes? Not everyone is as ghamandi and stuck up as you percieve them to be.
((apologies to all people who have been going.. "what the hell is this girl saying??"))

Thanks again to the rest of you. :) color of strife, i guess thats the ending.. I have nuthing more to write about 'her.'

Rythm ji !!!!, i think i am making the second mistake by replying to you. certainely, there is no place for arugument , reagrding your literature: all these are beyond my capacity. it looks like my words above are simply irritating and irrevelant. again for the second time with my perception in full bloom , i see your words differeing very much with your behaviour. if u really think u can have a light-hearted joke, at the same time why is that your thinking stops at that point. why i cannot have the same joke with u ?........

i know books cannot be judged by its cover, at th contraery . the first impression is the last one. these 2 satatemenst holds the same truth, but just as u said, where to apply and how ,makes the difference.another i know physchology is not my deparment, but its defenitely a point of my interest.

i really do not want to put you in such a stupid arguments whose ending is alwys baseless. it was just a idea of making you mad and looking at your reply i think i was more than just a succeess...i was never upset with the fact that we alwsy had a very unhealthy conversation. my sorry and apology to such a wonderful lady, to whom i had alwys admired for her innocence n hardwork n simplicity.
there will be no third mistakes on my part and this i will promise u , just take care of ur health and have a wonderful time.