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Racheeta
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Posted on 11-28-07 1:04
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Here's the scenario.!!!....I came to US last semester and i go to college in Nebraska...First of all i didnt' know many nepalese people around the campus and i started talking to few girls and i was close to them. I started talking to some other people and after couple months i was close to most of the people. I am kind of girl that likes talking to people, joking around, and just for fun.......& i started talking to this one guy(Guy A) in my college, as i m that kind of girl, who likes talking to everybody, and u know making fun of people sometimes, i didn't know if that guy liked me or not but i never ever thought that Way..I talk to this guy doesn't mean that i like the Guy....Days passed, i started talking to his friend(Guy B) the same way and now the guy is mad at me for nothing. He's mad because i shared most of the things with his friend. I talk to both of them the same way. He's mad at me cuz i m close to one of his friend and i hang out with him.....He thinks that way but for me, I talk to his friend the same way i used to talk to him, so what's the diff ? Well its my choice, if i enjoy talking to somebody, i talk to him......Yesterday he(Guy A) came to me and said, "why do you talk to my friend(Guy B), why do u tell everything"? Its not like i liked him first and switched a guy...Cant i even talk to people ? Why do guys think like that ? Are most guys like that or is that the only one guy who thinks like that ? What should i tell that guy now ? When i started talking to guy A, maybe he was thinkin i fell in love with him or somethin ??? is that right ? if no why is he saying all those stuffs to me..??
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The postings in this thread span 2 pages, go to PAGE 1.
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gahugoro
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Posted on 11-28-07 1:51
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yekloyatri
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Posted on 11-28-07 1:52
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First foremost women and their drama! It's never ending story. It's not your fault (whatever you name is women, coz i dont wanna scroll up ! too lazy). Take it this way, men are wired differently then women, their circuits and the codes implemented in their brain or whereever you may, are different. By the way you talk, joke around and share feeling so vividly would make that guy or anyguy feel like, "oh does she like me?" or some other college kids syndrome. Its natural when men are at that age. For women its not the saame, you have to do more and more and more and more and more (specially for south east asian women) then what you did above to get that "do you like me?" feelings. This might seem funny to you as to how that GUYA reacted. But this gives him an indication that yeah you are intrested and you are frank to him. Whereas in your case as a women, you think you are just being cool and talking to each other and this means just for fun, but guys dont think that way.
As someone above mentioned the guy might be unexperienced, well I partially agree with your assesment here. Yeah he could be unexperienced but hey we all are big boys with small heart anyway! how long does it take for a cheese to melt when you place em in front on the bright tourching sunlight? so on a even base.
Final resolution: Listen women or lady or girl or what have you! The best thing to do is, not to be a bithc and ask for explanation anyone other then that GUY A. I am wondering why are you denouncing about GUY A here in public and asking "are all men like that?" Go to him and ask him straight forward, how he feels about you? and all that gay stuff. And explain him that how you feel about him. Make things clear instead of goofing off here, since you done enough of goofing with your girlfriends and they are boored to answer this question of yours. Anyway i think i'm putting too much light on this issue or drama of yours.
Good luck
YekloYatri
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Sheetalb
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Posted on 11-28-07 2:00
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A lot of times girls do use this 'emotional' stuff to win friendship even though later they claim it to be nothing. I have seen so many girls in my class who hang out exclusively with one guy in particular if that guy could help them in any way - searching job in the beginning, being a friend in need, giving rides to school and shopping, etc and they act so sweet and nice and all that. Obviously this will give false alarm to the poor guy especially when he is good hearted enough to help her in the beginning. And as their better friends come alone, the girl try to be cozy with others. Haven't we seen so many girls living with a guy and claiming it to be nothing. This is pretty stereotypical of many girls who act innocent and want to have fun at the same time. They always present logic of - i was just being friend at the end. Friendship is a two way process and if your friend does not like you talking to someone else and if you value his friendship and then you do nto blame the whole 'guy' clan in sajha.com - you talk to your friend and explain him the situation or clear misunderstanding if there are any.
Being a girl myself - i know the tricks we play to get our way over things.Believe me....
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yekloyatri
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Posted on 11-28-07 2:04
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Women and their Drama! AGAIN ! AGAIN! over and over AGAIN!
AMEN Sheetalb!
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sharpshooter
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Posted on 11-28-07 2:06
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99% percent of girls just know how to talk sweet and take advantage of poor good-hearted lonely guy. Guys just be careful when beautiful girl has just arrived to US and ask some help. These B**tches need to be FANTA.
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uptowngal
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Posted on 11-28-07 2:07
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lootekukur
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Posted on 11-28-07 2:14
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sheetalb, while your rhetoric may not apply to racheeta's case, kudos to you for being so candid with your opinion. i like it.
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no_quiero
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Posted on 11-28-07 2:14
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Racheeta its allright to write about about a guy. If I was that guy I would definitely be mad at you. Why ? because you are rediculing him in sajha. You are taking your own persional matter in public.
I would never come to conclusion unless I see GUY's A version of story.
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sad_soul
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Posted on 11-28-07 2:15
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LOVE tirainggle parya jasto chaa.....aaba nepali kti most of them US aayera bigrinchaan.....hamro college ma 3-4 jaana kale sanga lagera NEPALI bhanna laaj lagney ni pareka thiyye....aani A babu bhanda B ko ramro job chaa hola nice car chaa hola.....account ra credit card ma chappa paisa chaa hola so, keta haru laii matra dosh dinu aaghi aafno mukh pani aaina ma herneyy ho ki???So, if u keep this kind of mentality boys will only HUMP and DUMP you.....in fact u should not have shared his things to B after all.....pet ma kura addaina kti haru ko bhanthey buda pakha leyy....ho raichaaa.......
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Deep
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Posted on 11-28-07 2:22
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I agree with Lootebro, and Sheetlab.
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yekloyatri
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Posted on 11-28-07 2:28
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Sad_soul, i would recomend you to change your nickname to Racist_Soul! here is why i say this.
"hamro college ma 3-4 jaana kale sanga lagera NEPALI bhanna laaj lagney ni pareka thiyye"
Now i have few question if you would answer it kindly.
1.Why do you think that if they were out with other gentlemen beside of nepalese origin they are worst?
2.What if they were out with, for instance "white men" do you think they did something good in life?
3.Why do you have the mentality that nepalese women should only and only get into a relationship with nepalese men?
4.Despite of dwelling in this country aslo know as, free country which gives you freedom to choose and make your own descision why are you criticizing others rights and making judgement?
5.Why isnt your mentality changed even when you are furnished with quality education(i am guessing this part)?
and yeah finally i do agree with your final statement though, that does make a valid point.
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bhakunde bhut
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Posted on 11-28-07 2:29
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You are what you are. You have got your independent life- live it how you like. BUT BE ACCOUNTABLE TO YOURSELF. There is always a thing to solace " Do I care? "
When you do care, have a conviction.
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samosa
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Posted on 11-28-07 2:35
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I am in different scenario, but what can I tell you is that, " There is no friendship in between man and women" So, you need to be clear with your frined that you are not in love with him. What is love?- sharing, and caring. Probably, he misunderstood your feeling. So, be clear.
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Deep
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Posted on 11-28-07 2:36
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I think Racheeta should speak with guy A and clear things up. Huna sakchha A ra B dubai sanga pani kura garna paros -- but the situation in question needs to be addressed-- sooner the better-- After a few replies sajhama thread kurako marma bhanda antai antai tira jana thalchha dherai jasto -- yata pani testai hudai chha kyare--
Last edited: 28-Nov-07 02:38 PM
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sad_soul
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Posted on 11-28-07 2:43
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Thnx for the suggestion yeklo bro, what seems like a racist to you isn't what it seems.....i just had put a small part of the story........aaba college ko kura garda.....ppl who date descent BLACK guys is ok.....but the BLACKS in this case were all weed dealers and hardcore boozers aaba sittai ma grass pauchaa bhanera kaale sanga salkera lagney kti haru le garda hamilaii katti laaj lagthyo aaba aafaii thaa pau....as i am dating a white girl myself race dosen't matter but what kind of person are you into matters......so aaba mero yasma bhannu kei paani chaiina........
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lootekukur
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Posted on 11-28-07 2:59
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guys guys.... let's not be too harsh on racheeta, shall we? we cannot just assume and make her already entangled matter even worse for her to decide on. what you all said could be right, but what she's telling can also be right, i.e. may be the guy misinterpreted her friendly expressions/actions/jives? and moreover, everything could be correct but still due to circumstances, we go through complications in life, no? let's stop passing on judgments, racial slurs and gender discriminatory remarks...let's be solution-oriented rather than pin-pointing each other's faults. so as deepbro mentioned, and as i see, the best possible solution in this regard for racheeta would be to TALK IN PERSON with both the guys and sort things out. clear any misunderstanding that's there. life is a learning experience: we falter, we flunk in testing times, we learn and we move on...that's what life is about. good luck to you racheeta
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lootekukur
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Posted on 11-28-07 3:20
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that said, again the reminder: if he loves you, he loves you: NO ONE can stop that, coz there's no stopping or coming back. emotions flow through a one way street hahaha
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AznshawtY
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Posted on 11-28-07 3:20
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That’s stupid like can’t you talk
about your things to more than one guy friend?! I hate the type of boyfriends that like
snooping in to almost everything that their girlfriends do, I mean as long as he has trust in you, why push you away by spying and becoming nosyy ? And
in your case, he’s not even your boyfriend so it’d be pretty stupid for him to
tell you who you should or shouldn’t talk, if he feels really jealous, let him deal
with it, its not your problem. This really reminds me of back in the days in
middle school as kids, pretty immature. You don’t just stop talking to people
because your friends don’t want you to, you pick your friends and what you want
to do. And if you’re this really outgoing person and you being his friend, he should know you well and put
up with that kind of attitude. Its funny we usually mistaken guys for not being like a dramaqueen or socializing much but they are the ones that love to talk to their guy friends about their friends or
girlfriends behind their back and get jealous and start fights!! if he thinks you're also in love with him, don't hurt him by keeping him in this love delusion, now be a lady and tell him that you DON'T like him as a boyfriend and stop tellig you what to do! common sense, honey.
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pjna007
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Posted on 11-28-07 3:22
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Racheeta,
If it’s a real problem, go and talk to the guy A. as you already assumed that he, may thinks you are in love with him, right? So what are you waiting for ? Go and clear up things about what YOU think …simple as that.
Exposing personal problems in a public forum barely helps you to come up with any solid conclusion, it rather entertains other. So, Solve it yourself girl.
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no_quiero
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Posted on 11-28-07 3:47
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One thing I am amazed. If Racheeta thinks that all guys are same then why do you go and talk to guys and bring trouble to yourself.
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