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 Nepalese Males in US

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Posted on 01-25-05 10:06 AM     Reply [Subscribe]
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Nepalese Males in the US:

Not for academic purposes. Just for humor.

If you do not fit into any of these categories, feel free to create one for your self.

Class I

?Came to US on some fellowship or scholarship but never looked to go back to Nepal.
?Well established in the US and can talk in lengths about the corruption and poverty in Nepal but never/ rarely did anything to help improve situation.
?Have problems with their Americanized children. Most worried when they change their BFs and GFs like underwears.
?Stable life with multiple mansions at the suburbs and drives BMW or Lexus or Mercedes.
?Frequently demonstrates ?status quo? among other fellow Nepalese in the social gatherings.
?Tries to give details about his earnings, assets and savings indirectly and sometimes directly.
?will live rest of the life with the same heavy accent that their children have stopped correcting.

Subdivision:

?Wants to invest in Nepal without expecting profit as a gesture of love towards the country.
?Wants dual citizenship policy implemented in Nepal so that they can spend their retirements peacefully with the social security in dollars.
?wife still cooks, does the dishes, laundry, polish his shoe and put food on the table after 25 of living in the US.

Class II

?Professional, highly educated.
?Towards midlife, very high prospects with the career.
?Modest living and likes to eat Gundruk and Masyaoura occasionally, but Dal, Bhaat are must for the dinner.
?Does Yoga or joins fitness classes: health conscious.
?Does not smoke but drinks socially.
?Even owns or founded a company.
?Honors family values and talks to the kids in Nepali.
?Maintains a mini-mandir and visits every day to do puja-path.


Subdivision:

?Does not contribute financially and socially at all to Nepal by any means.
?Probably married to an American chic or divorced, disregards all Nepali social values and customs as primitive and useless.
?Thinks Nepal is a Hell and dissociates with roots and all the connections.
?Rarely mingles with or hates the Nepalese community for their congenital behaviors.
?Frequently identifies himself as an Indian.


Class III

?Has wide variety of sexual preferences/experiences based on color of hair, eye, skin or ethnicity or body size, shapes and types etc.
?Frequents bar, clubs, topless clubs, pool clubs.
?Rarely eats at so-called apartment:
?Socialization level: at the max.
?Variety of packs of condom underneath the pillow.
?Had limited educational success in Nepal but heavily spoiled in US.
?Owns a sports car and tons of loans.
?Subscriber of Playboy, Penthouse magazine, and Internet porno.
?Encyclopedia of adult film stars. Jemima? Candy? Well ask him.
?If talks in Nepali: M#$i? ma#$%&*ni are the most repeated word.

Subdivision:

?An export of mass production of some affluent school in Nepal.
?Some enjoyed the financial support from the beurocratic parent or owner of a established business house in Nepal and attending better schools.
?Thinks studies hamper his social life.


Class IV

?Recent arrival on DV lottery green card; ?Well established with stable ?jaagir? back in Nepal but came to US for better future prospects and financial gains.
?Occasionally feels derogated with oneself for the kind of work they have to do which is totally different from their professional life, but limits the feelings to themselves.
?Has changed mind of going back to Nepal 1000 times.

Subdivision:

?Calls the green card ?hariyo-patta? and boasts among others who are struggling to get one for long.
?Pays to get fake marriage license with a Hispanic or Mexican or White chic to get one (GC) and gets married in Nepal with janti and gaja-baja before getting a divorce here.

Class V

?Shows concerns for the condition of Nepal. Donates few bucks for the cause of Nepal.
?Talks about the preservation of culture, language and literature and what not, but names own children completely American and rarely talk to them in Nepali.


Subdivision

?Organizes social events where fellow Nepalese gets together and guff-suff (chat) over bottles of beer and liquor.
?Apparently active but hated by many from the community.
?Wants his name to be publicized everywhere.



Class VI

?Hard working,
?Attends school to maintain visa status.
?Frequently sends money back home to support family.
?Struggles to pay the bills and shares apartment with six other fellow Nepalese.
?Usually misses the T or bus stops because of the tiredness and working odd hours like security guards.
?Can be spotted in the parking lots, restaurants and bakeries
?May be legally illegal in status.

Subdivision:

?Smells like restaurant.
?Some have spent fortunes to bribe and get the US Visa.
?Likes Khaini or Balwan chap surti.
?Usually has Nepali girl friend/ wife and monogamous.
?Does ?Namaste? and wears ?Palpali Dhaka Topi? at the Nepali gatherings.
?Talks in a very typical Nepali.
?Improvement: Hindi only.
 
Posted on 01-25-05 3:58 PM     Reply [Subscribe]
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Posted on 01-25-05 3:59 PM     Reply [Subscribe]
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Hey Shirish!! You are the great, good Job! I was amazed and impressed. You are able to depict almost the complete picture of Nepalese in USA. That?s great!! Keep it up. You must have seen all the four classes ha!! I have not had an opportunity to see all of them yet. Where do u fit into, BTW. Nothing personal! Just kidding!!

Nut

 
Posted on 01-25-05 4:10 PM     Reply [Subscribe]
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I DON'T FIT IN ANY OF THESE

 
Posted on 01-25-05 4:17 PM     Reply [Subscribe]
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Yea Bhatu!! Nither do I
 
Posted on 01-25-05 5:12 PM     Reply [Subscribe]
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"Comes to the US on fellowship or scholarship and .................."
Of they feel interested they will go back if not they wont... they dont have obligation to back if they dont want to. After all it's a matter of personal choice.

"Well established in the US and can talk.................."
There is no harm in expressing opinion about Nepal and other country. Why should they help do anything about corruption or poverty ? Socio-political culture of the country will not let them help anyway.

"Have Americanized children......................."
Children follow the attitudes and cultures of the country where they grow up. I dont think that a child that has grown up in Japan will end up having the social and cultural values of Brazil or a child that has grown up in Nigeria will having the social and cultural
attitudes of Russia.

"Wants duel citizenship..................."
Well, India has opened up and granted its citizens to have duel citizenships. Both th US and Canada has no problem with the matter. Why should we.

"Wife still cooks, does the dishes................"
Infact both husband and wife do to each other when necessary.

"Probably married to an Amrican chic.................."
That's a very personal decision..why should anyone care about it ? In fact, if someone is really worried about nepali values and customs, it's better they live and stay in Nepal not in the west. Live in the west with Nepali attitude, you'll have no success of intregrating with the mainstream society where you are living.
 
Posted on 01-25-05 5:26 PM     Reply [Subscribe]
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i think Netaa_ji le aba aafnai ra aafno lagi matrai sochna chodera aarule(shirish) yeso nepali hare yesto yesto conditon ma usa ma baseko chan hai bhanda sarai sahana naskeko jasto lagyo.
ki Netaa_ji shirish le lekheko kunai category ma pareko ho ki k ho ! (tyo pani naramro)
mirror here jastai lagyo ki k ho Netaa_ji..........
kiddin ya............ hahaha

pr_ric
 
Posted on 01-25-05 5:33 PM     Reply [Subscribe]
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pr_ric

well, I'm no longer living in the US , though I went to school in the US.
I permanently live in Canada .
 
Posted on 01-25-05 5:39 PM     Reply [Subscribe]
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Shirsh dada, love your article. how about having one of the students and their loans ? OR another group cunfused between getting a job or going to grad. school? Or maybe about trying to get a job where they sponsor your H-1 or another group whose H-1 is almost in the process of expiring and they don't know what to do.

Anyways, still waiting for the second part of the top 10 reasons.


 
Posted on 01-25-05 5:40 PM     Reply [Subscribe]
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teso ta ma pani US ma hoina, Netaa_ji,

but what abt...........
basunjel one of those ma parinthyo ki,

aasshhaa cha mero jigyasshhaa lai yehale samadhan garidnu huncha


 
presidentofnepal2035
Posted on 01-25-05 6:20 PM     Reply [Subscribe]
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very nice shirish. good job. i think i fall under sub division of class VI. i have improved my Hindi and telugu very much.
Nepali :- dherai ramro
Hindi :- bahut aachha
Telugu:- Nuvu baga unnanu
English :- hummmmm.....
 
Posted on 01-25-05 9:25 PM     Reply [Subscribe]
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Sirishji,
Nice one !!!

Sagun
 
Posted on 01-26-05 7:59 AM     Reply [Subscribe]
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My Hats off Sirish ji, Keep up the good work. Enjoyed Sajha reading after a long time. BTW where is Deep Ji?
 
Posted on 01-26-05 10:18 AM     Reply [Subscribe]
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Pr_ric

Well I have no Idea if I fit into one of those categories or not but I definately loved the ideas of the western culture, where no one cared about what you do or did and I didnt care what others do or did, the complete freedom of choice and complete freedom to express opinion with no fear of recourse.

Went to school, had pretty hot and exciting times, when the studies ended it was time to leave but never wanted to go to Nepal simply because I never believed I'll ever be able to live in Nepal. Headed straight towards northern border and landed myself into a job in Canada. Now I dont have obligation socially or leagally to go back to Nepal....haehhehehehheh....
 
Posted on 01-26-05 10:51 AM     Reply [Subscribe]
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shirish,
this is normally the classification of NEPALESE everywhere in the west.
One thing in whatever sub division they are classified, they have few things in commom- 1. arkale garkikhako riss garne
2. guuf badhi kaam kam garne
3. scheduled time bhanda jaile late hune
4. nepal ma janmeko ma avagi bhanera afulai nai sarapne
5. kei successful bhaihalyo bhane bhai ma khutta narakhi 12 haat lamo naak parera udna khojne.
6. afu bhanda kam sampanna manchhe lai hepne thula bada ko agadi thurthur kaapne
7. kunai nepali lai help garnu parla bhanera sahrai sarauna.

nepali ka 7 lachhinharu, jo jatisukai padyalekhya sampanna ra budhiman bhae pani common characteristics.
 
Posted on 01-27-05 6:54 AM     Reply [Subscribe]
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Neta ji

Your Bhasan is good.

We all live by our own personal decisions. You are right.

Mabi
 
Posted on 01-27-05 7:16 AM     Reply [Subscribe]
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Copied from Sajha writers guild
Thought it was appropriate.


Swan's clothes and Duck's Heart

Author: Rabindra Mishra, January 03, 2005

It was like a dream come true
When he arrived with a tattered suitcase
Stuffed with, among other things,
Torn underwear and an old wedding-suit.

He jumped the cues, with White men,
Smiled with servitude
Looked like a duck in the group of swans
But he was hard-working like a donkey
Followed instructions like a trained monkey,
And was sincere like a dog.

That handsomely paid him back
He prospered
Both in profession and possession.

He began to enjoy English jokes
Learnt to use knife and fork
Though with certain inhibition,
He wore swan?s clothes.

When drunk, he spoke of difficult days back home:
How his parents struggled to send him school
How they lacked proper food
How entire villages suffered from poverty
And those in positions lacked morality.

Now
He belongs to the upper-middle class
Sometimes acts like an aristocrat
But he rarely donates to charities,
Supports the Conservatives
With whom, he thinks
The rich pay less tax.

And this morning
His son told me
How, sometimes, he feels a bit embarrassed ?
That his father wears swan?s clothes
But still has a duck?s heart.

09 December 2004
London




 
Posted on 01-27-05 7:46 AM     Reply [Subscribe]
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Jai hosh Shirish Babu ko!

You made me come back from exile!
 
Posted on 01-27-05 7:58 AM     Reply [Subscribe]
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Shirish, hahaha... I fell on the case VIth... ehehe... myaaaaan.... most ghata lagdo part.... "improvement? hindi only" ehehe... are bhai, aap kaise hain, maje mein hai?? eheh... Paramendra dangga parla...

Occasional punjabi ni harib cha ni... :P Are o praaji tusi ki haal hein, ehehe.. balle balle sabba sabba... behendi... hehe...


 
Posted on 01-27-05 8:21 AM     Reply [Subscribe]
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gaachi ko analysis. but where do people like I fit into?

anaya bhayo.... how about Class VII for H1B walas ;) LOL
 



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