The recent melodrama in the media regarding a social service icon Dilshova comes as a harsh reminder of the day and age we live in.

The main issue was that the credibility of Dilshova was attacked in a very heinous manner - accusing her of sexual misconduct on the very children she gave her life to serve. This was the worst slander and defamation of character that was possible and the involved media chose to publish such harsh judgment on her character without any kind of verification or sense of responsibility. Even the name of the journalist making the accusation has not been published.

It is a shame that many highly qualified educated individuals are seemingly participating in the blame game instead of trying to understand the gravity of the situation. The point is that a selfless individual who was doing an immense service to the needy was attacked in a moral and personal manner, and the so called educated elite is trying to make it about the 'management', 'record keeping' and 'healthy living conditions'.

They forget that this is Dilshova's home, and how many of you know homes where they need to have a big management for record keeping and meeting specific requirement? This is not the US or some developed country we are talking about. In paper it looks good to say we have this many educated and this many hospitals, but in the street and village level, we have the majority of Nepali population living in worse conditions than the one provided by Dilshova. You cannot blame her for making their lives better off than it would have been without her intervention.

Legally, maybe she's required to file papers and such, but you cannot blame an unlicensed surgeon for saving a man dying of heart attack. However, if it is in your character to find fault you can always find fault saying 'He was not even licensed.' 'He had not taken a bath for a month.' 'He was not using sanitized equipment or gloves.' and the list can go on. But, the most important point here is that a life was saved. Whether it was a legal thing or not is not important specially in Nepal where murderers roam free with protection from higher echelon of the legal entities.

So dwelling on the legality of social service is a ridiculous stance that anyone can take. The sanitation is an important issue, but then again, how many Nepali families have access to good sanitation? Someone living exposed to the street is worse off than someone living under Dilshova's house. Would it be nice? Yes, obviously! It would be nice if everyone in Nepal had access to fresh drinking water, access to medication, sanitary living environment and all that, but we cannot force the ideal scenario onto harsh reality.

As far as the establishment reeking urine and feces, anyone who have been to a daycare of infants will know that it is only normal for such smell and similarly when there are numerous elderlies with low control over their bowels and bladders, then such smell is only natural.

Having said all this, obviously some better management would be nice, but then again, there are many things in this life that would be nice. I am sure this comes as a good lesson to Dilshova in the need to manage more - as long as she has the finances for it.

All I am saying is that let's not put excessive undue stress on trivialities, and appreciate the big picture. A social service icon's character has been defamed by the greedy media who want to sensationalize everything so that they can sell well. Instead of focusing on 'good to have things', can we look critically at these irresponsible media for their false claim, trying to discredit a known figure to gain negative publicity for their own establishments?

http://setopati.net/opinion/752/Happy,-Angry-and-Sad-Over-Dil-Shova/

Even I found it ridiculous when I read certain journalists and representatives of govt. body were ranting at her for poor sanitary condition of the home. They are okay that there are zillions of homeless old people/ small kids on the road who have to beg to barely meet their two times meal but they have a huuuuuuge issue with the condition of Aama ghar where she's providing roof and meals to these needy ones. (I'm not saying needy ones do not deserve sanitation but roof and meal comes first.) And then, they are talking about legal requirements......which is utterly hilarious. I think they forgot that she's not the manager of some govt. run old age home or an orphanage. Instead of appreciating what an illiterate and inefficient woman like her is doing for these less fortunate ones, which actually is the responsibility of the state, they are harassing her. I'm, in fact, thinking about those kids who have been rescued from her home. I hope they don't end up on the road, amen.

This big mouth all Nepali Media are like a sheep. They just follow whoever is in front and publish the news without officially making sure what is right and what is wrong. I was amazed by the news that the CDO of Kathmandu was so excited to rescue the children and so called talented and hardworking volunteers. My question is where were all they when street children were sniffing dendrite, digging for food at the garbage and old folks were lying on the streets starving to death with unhealthy condition who were kicked out by their own family members. What they expect in her house where there are numerous persons living their painful life but far better than in the streets?

देशको बारेमा जति पोजिटिभ कुरा सोच्छु भन्छु मरीकाटे आउने हैन, लौ बा यो त राम्रो भयो भनेर भन्छु अर्को नराम्रो देख्छु |

सतिले सरापेको देश भन्दिन भन्छु , भिम मल्ल र भिमसेन थापा सेरिएको देश बिर्सन्छु भन्छु , फेरी दिल शोभा दिदीको घटनाले सम्झाई रहन्छ |

ड़ा. गोबिन्द केसीले मृत्युको पर्वाह नगरी अनशन बस्यो, राम्रो नियतले , तिनलाई पनि देशकै संबिधान सभा भित्र सभासदले मेडिकल माफियाको उपाधि दिए, आज दिल शोभालाइ यौन दुराचारी अझ भनुं सेक्स राकेट संचालक समेतको उपाधिले विभूषित गरि दिए |

हो नियोले भने जस्तै देशमा लाखौँको संख्यामा मान्छेहरु नारकीय जीवन गुजारी रहेका छन् | अझै सयौं परिवारले त्यागेका बृद्धहरु पाटी, पौवा , मन्दिरको फल्चाहरुमा जीवनको अन्तिम नर्क भोगिराख्या छन् | सके जतिलाई दिल शोभाले आफ्नो आश्रयमा राखेका छन् | नियम कानूनले चलाएको आश्रय स्थल हैन त्यो आमा घर , आमाको मन ले चलेको घर हो | नियम कानून जान्ने भैदिएको भए एन जी ओ खोलेरै डलरमा कलर जमाउँथि होली | हिसाब किताब दुरस्त राख्न सके ब्यापारी हुन्थी |

ममताको आश्रयमा न ऐन नियम हुन्छ न हिसाब किताब |

नियोलाई एउटा सुझाव ( त्यसो त "दिल शोभा को दिल 'फण्ड' बनाउँदा पनि भनेको थिएँ) |

१. एउटा स्थायी फण्ड स्थापना गरौँ जसमा महिनाको १, २. ५, १० डलर राख्ने मनहरुको धन संकलन गरौँ |
२. त्यो धनले एक जना योग्य म्यानेजर /एकाऊंटेन्टको ब्यबस्था गरी तिनलाई चलेको तलब सुबिधा त्यही फण्ड बाट दिउँ |

यसरी फताह जालीहरुको फन्दाबाट पनि बच्ने र नियम कानून र हिसाब किटान दुरुस्त दुवै हुने देखिन्छ | साथै दिल शोभा दिदीलाई अतिरिक्त आर्थिक भार पनि नहुने हुन्छ |

बाकि नियोको मर्जी .....

Thank you San dai for taking your stand for innocent Dilshova. Proud to be a part of Sajha.com

Very well said San dai. Could not have said better myself.

On a different note, maybe we should organize a fundraiser for her. The legal and mental toll from this cannot be mitigated with money but we might be help her cope with the expenses, even if it is a drop in a bucket.

San bro,

As the Setopati piece put it, "she is guilty of good intentions and bad planning". Or as the saying goes no good deed goes unpunished.

The allegations of sexual misconduct, from what I can gather, are a bunch of BS.

As far as squalid conditions are concerned, they are common place in old age homes in Nepal. The real issue here might be the fact that she is a public figure who has collected donations in the name of helping others and the media feels entitled to audit her and decide whether or not she is doing a good job. That is the culture we seem to be living in. Vigilante journalism, vigilante activism etc.

I am not surprised at Umesh Shrestha and My Sansar chasing after this story. What is strange is Cosomos Bishwakarma (My Republica) and Prateek Pradhan (still at Nagarik I presume) choosing to stake their reputations by putting this story front and center in their newspapers. Let's hope SSP Kharel does a thorough investigation of this and gets to the bottom of things.

Great analysis, San!

I think its foolish to say something for or against Dil Shova without knowing the facts.
All the accusations may be true or false, it will come to light upon investigation.
Don't let emotion put a blindfold on truth.

We are all aware that there are many NGOs in Nepal which are primarily opened with the aim of collecting money rather than providing better service to society.

I second Thuldaai

San Bro,
This is the first time I have to disagree with you. I've read many posts by you which were more touching and motivational, but not this one.

I agree on few points though, unless proven guilty no one should judge Dil Shova for any of the accusations. And on the mean time, no one should rally against the news outlet or the reporter for reporting a news, that government is investigating based on a complaint and evidence. Yeah, the ones which just got the snippets and portrayed incomplete news are the ones to blame.

First and foremost, the waiver to follow rules, because it not the US but Nepal, is very dangerous. No one should encourage, specially in public forum to disregard laws of any land. And Dil Shova should have taken care of those as she is now a 'celebrity social worker', with many recognition, awards and public appearances, has role model for many youths. If she doesn't portray a clean social work, many will use that as excuse in future. As important it is to do good deed, good foundation is equally necessary. If this incident is let go, then there would not be a basis to investigate anyone in future. If any other NGO had done the same thing, will you be saying the same?

I completely understand how life is Nepal or other under developed country. Dil Shova has a great heart and used her own property and money before she got any assistance. She still lives the same way as others in her care do. She is humble and simple.

But does is do any good to the ones in her shelter if the needed care is not provided. Those kids could have been homeless and without food. Agreed. But being together like this and no proper care, no proper sanitation just makes it worse. both kids and elderly are very susceptible to disease. When one gets sick, it will sicken all. A kid may have died (sorry for bad choice of word) quietly somewhere, now 2 dozens may suffer. If kids were treated this way in other NGO, would you be writing the same?

Many family may not have choice or means to have good sanitation. But its within their family. I can chose how I want to love. But when one says, I'll take care of, and not only you many more, and for that I am will use public's money, it is no longer personal. That's why there are regulations. Yeah, may not have been enforced and many other cases go unnoticed. Does that mean all cases should be ignored. Even when a written complaint with evidence (most sound valid) has been filed? Would you be thinking the same way in some other INGO did the same?

If we agree with you, none of the improper management of any hospital, elderly places, children homes can ever be prosecuted. Because whatever they are doing, they are making lives of some at least better than what id would have been. That would give freedom to do anything, if are doing at least something good.

If we agree with you, it would be ok for someone to give shelter to 20 kids and make 5 of them work in his restaurant, 16 hr a day. He will still be okay because he gave 'better' life to them than what they would have gotten other wise.

If we agree with you, all child domestic helpers will be okay. They got something to eat and floor to sleep with roof above. Are you saying we should encouraging more kids from poor families be allowed to work for the rich in their homes, because they will get food to eat, tv to watch, water to bathe (may be warm water)? I doubt it.

I see you mean well, but cannot agree with your logic or the words.
May be I am way too wrong, but I felt compelled to respond.

This shows the cheap mentality of the people or hypocrites i must say.People who dont do anything for others and worse who cannot stand people who do good for others. Sadly and the bitter truth is our society has the majority of the such people who instead of lauding the effort of Dilshova , they try to bring her down . That reflects why our country is in such a primitive state, because of narrow mindedness of rulers of this country and the people who reside in it!!!

This case is going more complicated. Just watched the footage on Mysansar.com . I mean what the hell is happening?

@ san,
I do appreciate the way you have expressed your idea via this post.
Must say, good one.

Its better not to pass any judgements before the truth comes out.

The news could be an aftermath of lots of unhappy NGOs who are getting $$$ but getting no media coverage or attention like Dilshova and want to bring Dilshova's house down.

Or it could be an aftermath of Dilshova's greed like the article is saying. Money can make anyone evil and it may have applied to Dilshova too. I too had donated her through Sajha and the selling of food, clothes and books are just horrifying accusations. I hope these are not true. Some of the children were wearing rag torn clothes and accusations of selling new clothes to a shop and sending sacks of cash to her Maiti is floating around. Those things need to be cleared out.

However, i do agree with kids and the grandmas doing small house hold chores while they live there. Nothing wrong with that but what needs to be investigated is whether she was actually selling child labor outside or running a prostitution racket.

This is indeed a shocking news to me as i am so skeptic of these so called social workers and their motives but i had huge faith and trust on Dilshova and i thought she was genuine.

You just wrote exactly the way I feel about, NewTrader.

This is from another of my conversation on the same topic. Will post more later...




For me the issue was more with slander than anything else. When a reputable media says something like

"आमाघर’को नाममा वृद्धा र अनाथ बालबालिकाको स्याहारसुसार गरेर चर्चामा आएकी समाजसेवी दिलशोभा श्रेष्ठ आश्रयको आवरणमा यौन दुराचारका क्रियाकलापमा संलग्न रहेको तथ्य फेला परेको छ।"

We all know what "तथ्य फेला परेको छ" means and that's why it is just wrong in so many levels, and any self respecting citizen must voice their concern when such media abuse their right to tarnish anyone's good name with their make believe sensationalized news.

As far as her questionable management skills, I have no doubt she needs to hire a good management team but that does not justify anyone portraying her as a sexual abuser. Also, you can't compare other more organized orphanages and elderly homes to AMA Ghar since Ama ghar was never started an organized institution. It started off when Dilshova brought in helpless elderlies lying in the street to her house to care for them. I may be mistaken, but I haven't heard of any other elderly home that was started by a person showing compassion and picking helpless elderlies from the streets to their own home. For that she deserves some respect.

The kids who were 'rescued' from there, does the government have any plan or process for them? Where was the government when these people were wandering in the streets? When the government has priority to 'rescue' these kids from a mismanaged orphanage, why doesn't the govt have any time nor priority to 'rescue' the majority of Nepali population who are living under worst conditions than these kids? Maybe we should file a report that majority of Nepali parents in village are not providing proper sanitation to their children and the govt will go in and rescue all the kids.

Until the facts come out, all this he said she said is nothing but BULLSHIT. Journalists with egos lager than life publicly prosecuting an uneducated old lady is disgraceful. I have seen ACCUSATIONS but NO EVIDENCE. So let us not jump to conclusions..

San Bro,

You seem to have a blind faith on Dilshova. There is a saying in Nepali that if there is a smoke there is always a fire. There has been just to much smoke circulating around Dilshova. There are lots of other social workers too and they rarely make it to news. Dilshova has been controversial in money matters every now and then.

If the selling of children's note books, foods, and clothes are true while the children are eating rotten food, wearning torn clothes and Dil is shipping bags of cash to her family then i am going to get really disgusted by her. I am going to wait until more truth comes out before slandering her. So far we are only reading what she is saying and what her accusers are saying. Innocent until proven i guess.