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swaati thapa
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Posted on 01-16-05 10:19
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One day Lord shiva decided to visit Nepal. So he changed his get-up and went down earth. He roam all over country. he became very sad due to the sorry state of nepal. He feel so sorry that he want to drink alcohol to forget his pain. He goes to some bar at thamel. Once he enters bar, Shiva: "What all do u have". Bartender: "We have whisky, rum, vodka, gin, beer etc etc." Lord Shiva: "Let's try whisky first. Give me 5 bottles of whisky". Afterhaving 5 bottles of whisky, Lord shiva decided to try Rum. Bartender was shocked: "Who is this man, after having 5 bottles ofwhisky,he is still on his feet". After having 5 bottles of Rum, Shiva decided to have beer. After having 40 bottles of beer, he asked the bartender for Gin. Bartender couldn't stop himself asking him: "Sir, who are you?? I have seen people getting drunk after having 4 glasses of whisky, and you've almosthad 50 bottles and you are still on your feet, who are you"??? Lord Shiva: "Baalak, Ma Bhagwaan Shiv ho". Bartender: bulla laagecha mora lai !!!
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The postings in this thread span 2 pages, go to PAGE 1.
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bhattu
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Posted on 01-16-05 11:23
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man all these sajha people are morons just look at the stuff they talk about look at the jokes they laugh at. if i post one good joke they won't laugh coz they don't have brains to understand what i post. stupid stupid nepalese no wonder nepal is going down the drain
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Stepfather
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Posted on 01-16-05 11:24
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hey Foe_misty and ruina, u guys gave me a good idea. i will come up with some lame jokes later. When u are laughing at thsoe, your mothers will be probably having the time of her life with your sweet old stepfather. now, let me find those jokes first...
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bhattu
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Posted on 01-16-05 11:26
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FOR U MORONS HERE ARE SOME GOOD JOKES U WON'T UNDERSTAND BUT STILL... The Italian says, "When I have a-finished makina love with my girl-a-friend, I go down and gently tickle the back of her knees. She floatsa 6 inches abova da bed in ecstasy". The Frenchman replies, "Zat is nothing, wen Ah 'ave finished making ze love with ze girlfriend Ah kiss all ze way down her body and zen Ah lick ze soles of her feet with mah tongue and she floats 12 inches above ze bed in pure ecstasy". T he Irishman says, "Dat's nottin. When Oi've finished shaggin' me bord, I get out of da bed, walk over to d'window and wipe me knob on da curtain. She hits da fockin' roof. ************************************************************************************* A fireman is polishing a fire engine outside the fire station when he notices a little girl next door in a little red cart with little ladders hung off the side and a garden hose tightly coiled in the middle. The little girl is wearing a fireman's helmet and has the cart tied to a dog and cat. The fire fighter walks over to take a closer look, "That's a lovely fire engine," says the fireman admiringly. "Thanks," says the little girl. The fireman looks closer and notices the little girl has tied one of the cart's strings to the dog's collar and one to the cat's testicles. "Little colleague," says the fireman, "I don't want to tell you how to run your fire engine, but if you were to tie that rope around the cat's collar, I think you could probably go a lot faster." The little girl pauses for a moment to think, looks at the wagon, at the dog and at the cat, then shyly looks up into the fireman's eyes and says... "You're probably right, but then I wouldn't have a f*****g siren, would I. ? ************************************************************************************** Some years ago, a Russian oil baron who had six children, all girls,began to despair as he had no son and heir. Imagine his joy when one of his wives finally presented him with a son and heir. Just before his son's sixth birthday, the baron took him to one side and said, "Son,I am very proud of you. Anything you want, I shall get for you." His Son replied, "Daddy, I would like to have my own airplane." Not wanting to do anything by halves, his father bought him United Airlines. Just before his son's seventh birthday, the baron took him to one side. "Son, you are my pride and joy. Anything you want, I shall get for you." His son replied, "Daddy, I would like a boat." Not wanting to do anything halfway, his father bought him The Princess Cruise Lines. Just before his son's eighth birthday, the baron took him to one side. "Son, you bring so much happiness into my life. Anything you want, I shall get for you." His son replied, "Daddy, I would like to be able to watch cartoons." Not wanting to look a cheapskate, his father bought him Disney Studios and their theatres, where he watched all his favourite cartoons. Just before his son's ninth birthday, the baron took him to one side. "Son, you are an inspiration to us all. Anything you want, I shall get for you." His son, who was by now really into the Disney cartoons, replied, " Daddy, I would like a Mickey Mouse outfit." Not wanting to appear to be tight, his father bought him Chelsea Football club.
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bhattu
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Posted on 01-16-05 11:28
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Two couples were playing poker one evening. John accidentally dropped some cards on the floor. When he bent down under the table to pick them up, he noticed that Bill's wife Sue, legs spread wide, wasn't wearing any underwear! Shocked by this, John upon trying to sit back up again, hit his head on the table and emerged red-faced. Later, John went to the kitchen to get some refreshments. Sue followed and asked, "Did you see anything that you liked under there?" Surprised by her boldness, John courageously admitted that, well, indeed he did. She said, "Well, you can have it but it will cost you $500." After taking a minute or two to assess the financial as well as the moral costs of this offer, John indicates that he is indeed interested. She tells him that since her husband, Bill works Friday afternoons and John doesn't, that John should be at her house around 2:00 Friday afternoon. When Friday rolled around, John showed up at Bill's house for the planned time with Sue at 2:00 PM sharp and after paying her the agreed sum of $500, they went to the bedroom and closed their sexual transaction as Sue had promised. Afterwards, John quickly dressed and left. As usual, Bill came home from work at 6:00 PM and upon entering the house, asked his wife abruptly, "Did John come by the house this afternoon?" A little worried, Bill's wife answered, "Why yes, he did stop by for a few minutes this afternoon." Her heart nearly skipped a beat when her husband curtly asked, "And did he give you $500?" In terror, she assumed that somehow he'd found out, and after mustering up her best poker face, replied, "Well, yes, in fact he did give me $500." Bill, with a satisfied look on his face, surprised his wife by saying, "Good, I was hoping he did. He came by the office this morning and borrowed $500 from me. He promised he'd stop by the house this afternoon and pay me back." NOW THAT'S A POKER PLAYER!!
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bhattu
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Posted on 01-16-05 11:29
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The 7 dwarfs went to the Vatican, and because they are "THE DWARFS," they are ushered in to see the Pope. Dopey leads the pack. "Son," says the Pope, "What can I do for you?" Dopey replies, "Excuse me, your Excellency, but are there any dwarf nuns in Rome?" The Pope wrinkles his brow at the odd question, thinks for a moment and answers, "No, Dopey, there are no dwarf nuns in Rome." In the background, a few of the dwarfs start giggling. Dopey turns around and gives them a glare, silencing them. Dopey turns back, "Your Worship, are there any dwarf nuns in all of Europe?" The Pope, puzzled now, again thinks for a moment and then answers, "No, Dopey, there are no dwarf nuns in Europe." This time, all the other dwarfs burst into laughter. Once again, Dopey turns around and silences them with an angry glare. Dopey turns back to the Pope and says, "Mr. Pope, are there ANY dwarf nuns anywhere in the world?" "I'm sorry, my son, there are no dwarf nuns anywhere in the world." The other dwarfs collapse into a heap, rolling and laughing, pounding the floor, tears rolling down their cheeks as they begin chanting . . "Dopey f*cked a penguin!...Dopey f*cked a penguin!"
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Stepfather
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Posted on 01-16-05 11:47
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Ruina, i realized that u hadnt dragged my family members into the discussion. So i take my earlier posting back and apologize to you. Sorry. And Foe_4_misty bro, your mom was great, dude! Keep on laughing, I and your mother are havig a great time here.
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jhyam_putali
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Posted on 01-16-05 12:05
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Hey Sautini Bau or Step father, Internet bata chada jokes lyaera paste gardaima timi thulo hudainau. Ani timi afu lai ekdam intellegent thanchau. Lau lau ..timi ADULT manche, chada jokes bhanna ma ustaad chau re maniyo. Euta ramro safa joke bhanera sajha ma sabai lai hasai deu ta ani ma manchu. Ani you Nepali lai gaali garne chahi kina ni...Timi lai chahi nepali le janmako hoina ki kaso? Timi chahi ke Nepali hoina? lau hoina bhane thokuwa garera bhana... Ani cha ni , tyo WTF, ASSHOLE, SOB ..aadi ityadi bhandaima manche American hudaina...afno deemag ma bhaeko fohor dump garera matra yaha saajha ma kuro garna aau. I am Nepali and I am proud.
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Foe_4_mysty
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Posted on 01-16-05 12:08
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Step father!u Scumbag! U and Bhattu must b an abigail! Step father was that u bast**d who raped his own mother? arrgggghhhh haven't seen such contemptible, detestable person is sajha. Its wastin of ma precious time to argue wid a spunk bubble lyke ya! GTH
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jhyam_putali
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Posted on 01-16-05 12:09
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and one more thing before I leave.... If you want to compete about jokes , I can tell you jokes that you have never heard of....but that can be done later. Now I just want to let you know that there are many people like you who know plenty of bad jokes but they are NEPALI thats why they wouldnt post those in Sajha. Shame on you that you are a Nepali
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Stepfather
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Posted on 01-16-05 1:35
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Dear stepson foe_4_misty, I just finished doing to your mom for the second time. She is happy and satisfied but still being a little naughty ;) Son, she is still by my side and has told you not to be red with angry as its gonna hurt yourself. And by the way, I did not read your whole posting as I was too busy with your mom. Just felt like giving some suggestions as I and yr mom could see you getting red with angry. Oh, now your mom has requested me for the third time???..oh naughty her :). If you don?t see me posting here, its probably because I would be working very hard on her ;) Take care and be good :) Your loving stepfather
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presidentofnepal2035
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Posted on 01-16-05 10:28
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When did Shiva start drinking booze? I have heard that joke in another version. Actually Shiva comes to the ground and joins with some Nepali hippies. He smokes hash with them and remains sober for long time. Later on when he has to return back to heaven, he reveals that he is 'Shiva' in front of all hash smokers.At that time the hash smokers reacted; shiva lai balla lagechha?. That?s all? I think Swaati Thapa violated the copy rights act 1998 of Nepal. lol
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harkedai
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Posted on 01-17-05 1:57
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Sunna ta maile pani shiva le joint taneko nai suneko ho, tara new versoin is cool. Swaati good job, u r awesome. Bros haru room ma bau aama ko kura chai nagarda ramro hola bhanne mero bichar ho, palana garda ramro hola. bhattu ji, mero yeuta saanu prasna tapailai, tapai ko joke ma kaha nira haasne bhanera ali bujhna garo bho, aba arko pali dekhi yesta prakar ka chutkila haru lekhda kaha nira haasne bhanera pani lekhi dinu bho bhane sarai besh hune thiyo. Yesh kura ma aru sathi haru ko k bichar cha, aru ko pani bichar sunna ma sarai utshuk chu. Antya ma "BHATTU JI UR JOKES SUX DUDE". Come up with something interesting. I am a play boy because I always have sex with my wife bhanya jasto nagarnu na sathi. Testo utshrinkhal joke bhandai ma sabai jana haasdainan ni mitra. Malai ta joke haru khasai raamro aaudaina tara, bhattu jee ko chutkila le teti saaro chai hasayena hai. hus ta Jai Nepal
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ruina
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Posted on 01-17-05 5:16
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step father i am shocked u can say sorry!!!!thats great to know ... but i wanna ask u something dont u feel hurt when someone say something to ur parents or u say something abt ur and others parents???its kind of weird u know... just a thought don start shouting ni feri.......morons..bad sense of humomr bhanera... have some respect stepfather.....its how u treat other people ...so that they treat same to u....teacher bannu khojeko hoina...arti pani dinu khojeko hoina..just sorry bhanyau anii ramrai manche jasto lagera bujhe halchau ki bhanera bhaneko...... timilai matrai hoina bhattu lai, foe lai sabai lai bhaneko..sajha ma post garne sampurna byaktilai bhaneko jo foul word use garera ekdam thulo bhayeko thancha .....ali kati respect garda kehi bigridaina jasto lagcha malai.....aftearll we all are nepali..euta ko khuttaa tanayau bhanee arko pani ta baki rahadaina nii ....
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ruina
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Posted on 01-17-05 5:26
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bhattu donn know what am i suppose to say ???bhattu timi kattii chattu.... i knew it !!!!i knew u could only post dirty jokes i said that from begining...but as far as i have seen noone really found ur joke funny....its ur problem that u have bad sense of humour or its problem of other nepali who dont like shitty jokes ...hmm well guess it urself... MAN ALL THESE SAJA PEOPLE ARE MORON JUST LOOK AT THE STUFF THEY TALK.................................STUPID STUPID NEPALESE NO WONDER NEPAL IS GOING DOWN THE DRAIN..... mr bhattuuuuuu.....timi ta sachikai chatuuuuuuuuuuuu.......stupid nepalese??which category do u fall in??????nepal is not going back coz we laugh at good jokes and dont laugh at shitty one......well nepal is back coz somebody like u thinks shitty jokes are funny....everytimes that comes in head is only shit,crappy things......
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Paagal
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Posted on 01-17-05 6:14
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My five year old son, when asked " Why do I find your hands holding your dick every moring?" he replied " It's so cold in the morning and it's so warm inside, it's my heater, Dad"
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kILLERbUZz
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Posted on 01-17-05 10:22
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lord shiva ko joke gai ra thyo ... so lemme add one .... A man frustrated with the size of his Dick, decides to make it big ... he tries everything on the market , but without any successful result ... finally he makes the rite decision ... " Ma Bhagwan Shiva ko tapasya garchu ... " with this, he goes on to tapasya for a couple of years ... lord shiva becomes prassaannaa ... and then comes out .... Balak ma khusi bhaye , bhana timlai k chahinchaa ??? to that the man sayz - bhagwan mero Maal ekdamai thulo banaunu paryo ... Shiva - tathasthuuu after that, his Linga becomes huge , and without even saying thank you, he runs towards home with wild excitement ... to his surprise he hears shiva calling out his name " Balak , balak parkhi parkhi " Balak ley kina shiva karayo bhanera yasso pachadi herya ta Shiva bhagwan ley yatro thulo thulo duita poka bokera daudera ayi ra raicha ...then shiva said " sAley , Linga ta thulo banayis, tero yo thul thulo geda chai kalley boki dincha ni , la zhundayera lera jaa ??? " Peace ...
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harkedai
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Posted on 01-17-05 6:37
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Pahila sabai lai jadau bata suru garu hola, Bhagwaan lai ta utshrinkhal kura sanga najodau na sathi ho, Shiva ko bhako thau maa, ma chai ganesh ko jodi dinchu hai ta, starts like this: Ek patak chai, yeuta manche le ganesh ko thulooooooooooo tapasya garecha re, dherai barsa ko tapasya pachi Ganesh bhagwan khushi bhayechan ra ..................... La aba bar maag baalak bhanera bhanechan. Tyo manche pani...................... lau aba ta maageko kura paine bho bhanera danga pardai bhanecha................... prabhu malai ta sarai garo bhaisakyo, yeuta GAADI (car) paye hunthyo. Telle teti bhaneko matra k thyo, Ganesh ta rish le aago hudai bhanechan............... ma Ganesh bhagwan bhayera ta Musha chadera hidchu, talai k lai chahiyo ni GAADI. La laaa yo GANYAULA chad bhanera tyo manche tira yeuta ganyaula faalechan. (Hamro sathi bhai haru lai yo kasto lagyo pratkriya pauna paaye hunthyo) Yo mero pahilo prayas ho ra yo dherai jana le suni saknu bhayeko hola, yedi cha bhane antim ma chyama prarthi chu. hus ta Jai Nepal
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Stepfather
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Posted on 01-18-05 9:27
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Posted by Ruina on 01-17-05 5:16 AM Reply | Notify Admin tep father i am shocked u can say sorry!!!!thats great to know ... but i wanna ask u something dont u feel hurt when someone say something to ur parents or u say something abt ur and others parents???its kind of weird u know... ruina, i dont drag other?s parents into discussions (well i used to when i was 18/20). But when somebody does that to me, i dont shy away from it. Not that i m angry or anything, but i just want to give them a taste of their own medicine. I dont know how they feel. have some respect stepfather.....its how u treat other people ...so that they treat same to u.... I know. I have taught the same to many many others. In real life, i give and receive plenty of respect. dont u worry about that. Thx 4 the info though. god bless u
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ruina
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Posted on 01-18-05 6:59
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step father good to know....thanks for blessing..well i hope god bless u too.
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Nirman
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Posted on 01-18-05 10:09
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This post was good initially...but who morons make this filthy...and yeah swatati has violated copyright act of that shivaji drinking booze..but the anotehr one was craetive..i really love that one swaati..keep posting nice jokes...
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